The Connection
This week, I saw a special showing of a wonderful documentary called The Connection. It documents the kinds of things that we’ve been talking about on my radio show, Uplift Your Life: Nourishment of the Spirit since the inception. According to their research, 1 in 2 people are diagnosed with a chronic illness. That’s huge! Much of this is due to stress and our negative thought processes, even the negative messages that our doctors give us regarding a terminal diagnosis. What we believe about illness is all changing. Our mind can actually make us sick, and it can also heal our body. Releasing stress and believing that we can heal are essential components of the healing process. Please go back and listen to some of my on-demand shows for more information and continue to listen to new shows. Every show deals with the connection between our thoughts, emotions and physical and mental health, often providing tips and insights on how to help yourself heal.
Eating Disorders
Today, for example, our topic is weight, and our weight is influenced by our mind and our levels of stress. There’s even an expression, “we eat our feelings.” In other words, we eat unhealthy foods when we’re sad or stressed. If we haven’t received nurturing love from our parents, we usually don’t know how to have a healthy relationship with food. We may use food as a substitute for love, eating too much because we’re trying to feed ourselves the nurturing we never got or we overindulge in sweets in an attempt to receive the sweetness that is missing in our lives. If people have controlled us, food might be the only thing that we feel we have control over. People who grow up with abuse often develop eating disorders, and you can’t always tell by how much they weigh. Often people are able to hide their unhealthy relationship with food. They eat normally when in public, but then starve, purge, overeat or eat the wrong things when no one is looking.
Healing yourself changes your weight
When I was growing up, no one was talking about eating disorders. They did, however, talk about weight. As a young child, one of the neighborhood girls nicknamed me butterball, which created a love/hate relationship with food that became a constant in my life until a few years ago. From diet pills in my teens to crash diets in college to overeating alternating with avoiding food to restrictive diets like raw vegan—I tried everything to stabilize my weight and to eat in a healthy fashion. In the end, what finally worked was removing the stressors in my life. I healed my relationship with my Self. I learned to pay attention to how I felt. Was I happy or sad? Did I want to clean my plate or was I full? What did I feel like eating? What did I feel like doing? I substituted wants for shoulds. I slowly removed the abusive relationships in all areas of my life: personal, business and volunteer. If it didn’t feel good, I stopped doing it unless it truly was an essential. For instance, I still don’t like paying bills, but it is a necessary part of life. Most of what I thought was necessary, however, really wasn’t. I learned to make those distinctions and to take better care of myself in every way. I gave up perfectionism, overworking and feeling guilty if I didn’t finish my “to do” list. I learned to stop when I’m tired, to rest and sleep more and meditate daily. I have learned how to enjoy life and how to enjoy food. From weighing myself twice a day, I now only weigh myself when I go to the doctor. I’ve noticed that I tend to weigh a couple more pounds in summer than winter, and I don’t get scared that it’s a problem. I recognize what my body does and I accept it. I no longer worry that my eating or my weight will get out of control. I trust myself and that my body will tell me what it needs. Even my exercise
patterns are more relaxed. If I don’t get to yoga or tango, I’ll walk up and down my stairs a few times or take a long walk in the Arboretum or do some yoga poses at home. At this point in my life, the flexibility is important to me. That could change next week or next year. I’ve learned to trust these changes because I know that in every way possible my life keeps getting better and that includes my health, happiness, peace of mind and life balance.
